Things Your Neighbors Won't Tell You

The people living next door aren't who you think they are.

1. "Complaining will cost you dearly."

When Richard Laermer and his partner moved into a Manhattan co-op, his next door neighbor invited them over to dinner. "We had a lovely wine-infused time," recalls Laermer, a PR executive. But those good times didn't last. A few short weeks after breaking bread, Laermer left a Post-It note on the neighbor's door asking if her kids could be quieter in the mornings. The neighbor responded by cutting off all contact.

2. "I will use your Wi-Fi -- and get you arrested."

Nearly one-third of Americans admit to using their neighbor's Internet service, nearly double the number from two years ago, according to a national survey by the non-profit Wifi Alliance Trade Alliance. Such thieving can push your data usage above its monthly limit and increase your Wi-Fi bill, says McCall Butler, a spokeswoman for AT&T, who recommends that customers protect their Wi-Fi network with a password and change it regularly. Worse, there's no controlling what Wi-Fi thieves do with your signal, and if what they're doing is illegal, you could be in hot water.

3. "Good luck blocking out our din."

Unofficially, the biggest complaint people have about their neighbors is noise, says Bob Borzotta, who has conducted online polls on the issue at his website NeighborsFromHell.com. That includes barking dogs, loud music, car and house alarms and domestic arguments. And these aren't the constant complaints of a neighborhood killjoy. "I know two people who ended up having intestinal surgery because of anxiety related to long-running disputes with neighbors over noise," Borzotta says. Lost sleep and noisy neighbors can mean hefty doctor's bills to deal with anxiety and stress. People who suffer from psychological distress spend an average of $1,735 more on health care each year than lower-stress folks, according to research published last month by researchers at the Medical University at South Carolina. Another option -- soundproofing -- can cost $200 for one wall between you and the noisy neighbor and $300 for the ceiling, according to Ted White, president of the Michigan-based Soundproofing Company. Soundproof Windows range from $350 to $900 per window, according to Reno, Nevada-based Soundproof Windows Inc.

4. "I'm a registered sex offender."

For obvious reasons, this may be the last thing in the world your neighbor will tell you, but it's important, even for people who don't have children. Thanks to the Sexual Offender Act of 1994, also called "Megan's Law," people convicted of sex crimes must notify local law enforcement of any change of address or employment post-prison. That information is then made public, via the National Sex Offender Registry. And as would-be home buyers use these tools right along with Zillow to evaluate their future neighborhoods, the presence of a convicted sex-offender can hurt property values. A study by the researchers in Longwood College and Longwood University in Virginia said that registered sex offenders living nearby can reduce your home's value by 9% and homes near registered sex offenders can take over 70% longer to sell.

5. "We're ripping up the flower beds and planting corn."

Forget Farmville. About 43 million Americans now grow their own fruits, vegetables, berries and herbs, according to a 2009 National Gardening Association report, up 19% over the previous year. But what's good for the farmer isn't necessarily so good for his neighbors. A Virginia Tech study from 2009 suggested that landscaping and pristine lawns help increase property values by an average of 7.5%. A home valued at $150,000 with no landscaping could be worth up to from $8,000 to $19,000 more with a sophisticated landscape with color and large plants, the study said: "Relatively large landscape expenditures significantly increase perceived home value and will result in a higher selling price than homes with a minimal landscape."

6. "My apartment has bed bugs."

It only takes one embarrassed and silent neighbor with a mattress full of bed bugs to infect an entire apartment building. In one recent study, the arrival of a single suspected bedbug resulted in infestation in 45% of the units in a 233-unit apartment building within three years. Getting rid of the pests is hard -- it may take several cycles of extreme extermination, and around $550 for a typical one-bedroom apartment, according to San Francisco-based exterminator Dan Fitzsimmons.